I remember talking to someone in my social circle about the desire to be successful with an online business. I commented that the times were uncertain but good things were going to happen. It was an affirmation more than anything.
I was told “Don’t be afraid”. Unfortunately it wasn’t so much an endorsement of support as it was an indictment. Explaining what I meant was futile because the person already had their wall up.
They said what they said and that was the end of it. I walked away thinking what so many of us have thought when we experience one of these moments: Why did I open my mouth?
Now may be that was their way of helping out but the refusal to hear what I was saying afterwards was a clear indicator that they didn’t get it and didn’t want to.
The lesson was not lost on me
While it is nice to have a support network to keep encouraging you through thick and thin, it’s not always going to be there for whatever reason.
People have their own agendas which includes hearing what they want to hear. Sometimes that agenda is directly or indirectly to destroy your agenda.
Whatever you say or do rubs them the wrong way or goes against their outlook. Maybe it’s just timing and only reflects a moment. Try them tomorrow and you may get a completely different response and attitude.
But you can’t really wait for that
If you’re hoping the next day brings more positive feedback and it doesn’t come then what? Suppose next time the response is even nastier.
People are wild cards. You never really know how they are going to react to you or why. Many of us have walked into a room and said a pleasant and genuine hello to someone we just met for the first time and you can see and feel the negative reaction they have toward you. Maybe you’ve done that to others.
The bottom line is the positive support you are looking for or rightly need can only come from one person
Yep. Whether someone is in your corner completely or working at every turn to undermine you is irrelevant. You have to make the conscious decision to be your own support network. That means when the naysayers are out in force you have to be the one to pick you up and stay motivated to keep pushing.
Take encouragement where you can get it
But the only one who can and will be there for you twenty four hours a day seven days is the one staring back at you in the mirror every morning. Make peace with that person. Realize they’re on your side.
They’re not there to tell you every waking moment how you’re never wrong about anything. That’s not support that’s self delusion which benefits no one. Critiquing oneself should be a core component of personal growth but do it gently.
Above all stay determined
If you can use the support of other people and even the criticism that that gets thrown at you fine. But if things become too negative then cut those people in your circle loose.
They’re not doing you any good otherwise they would have by now. It’s not being mean it’s about self-preservation and being the best you that you can be.
Pessimism can bombard us the point we just give in to it. Many people have and some of those people will be those closest to you especially when you are trying to make positive improvements to your life.
Take it with a grain of salt and remember you are not only your best friend but your best support network.